This may be the weirdest cephalopod related thing I have ever posted on this blog. Please go and check out the octopus faith site. Let me warn you, dear uninitiated reader, that at first you may be frightened by the pictures of the perky octopus woman that come up. Don't worry, so was Jesus.
There is no point in me trying to summarize the site since it is so weird and fantastic. A direct quote:
"Do you want to go deep? Let 'deep sea travel guide' and Christian Women's Speaker, Janet Drez, take your women on an "under-sea" adventure using the attributes of the octopus as a unique and profound word-picture to discover and grow their "Octopus Faith®."
(Why is she taking "your" women? Who do these women belong to? Does she have to get permission first? Do they have a curfew? Why are there no men allowed? Is this actually about menstruation? OH MY GOD IS IT A CEPHALAPOD LESBIAN PLOT?!?!?! If so, can I attend??????)
But, most importantly, I feel the need to share the...
8 Tentacles of Octopus Faith®:
1. Praise: Do You Know Who God Is?
2. Pearls: Do You Know Who You Are?
3. Prayer: An Octopus Conversation
4. Pressure: How to Survive the Underwater Pressure
5. Power: Wrestling with an Enemy
6. Play: The Joy of Octopus Faith®
7. Passion: Longing for Octopus Faith®
8. Pass It On: Lead Someone Else into the Deep
(Okay, after reading number 6 and 7, I hope all of these women are given a complimentary octopus vibrator. Maybe that's why men aren't allowed.)
And finally, a quote from a satisfied octopus faith customer:
"Octopus Faith was exactly the message that was needed to springboard us into a season of 'deep sea diving' with Christ. Each and every lady was amazed and surprised at the analogy of our faith to octopus. All loved it and you!"
Michelle Gale, Director, First Ladies Women's Ministry
First Southern Baptist Church of Phoenix
Let's go deep sea diving with Jesus, y'all! Last one in the water is washed up jumbo squid servant of satan!
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Posted by Jessica at 11:16 AM